Mini Poem

***In sync like rhythm to a beat.
Like honey, so sweet even the bees remember me.
Love is like a taste of heaven, He's lucky.
I guess that's why my favorite number is 7. 
A sacred treasure, being without me, brings him no pleasure.
Not to sound cocky, but more so confident, 
if we ever break up, I know he'll be right back again. ***

The Beautiful Struggle

” … your greatest prayers are not usually answered in comfort.” – Tyler Perry

When I came across this in one of his post on face book, something about that statement clicked with me. I thought back to the times, more recently than not when I have prayed and asked God about certain things, in which he answered by placing me in uncomfortable situations. Not trying to get too personal but, I prayed to God, asking him if he would show me how to love myself. The answer to the prayer was not me waking up one morning, and suddenly discovering a new found love for myself but it was forcing to be in conflicts with others and myself that pushed me to finally take a stand for something. Taking a stand for something, was something that started my journey of self identity and what some people would say “identity crisis”. I don’t see it as a crisis personally, but rather a journey with pit stops, and detours that only lead to the destination you were meant to be. Yes, the journey is a struggle but it’s a beautiful one. I mean what would I learn about myself, and how would I learn to love and accept every flaw and and every strength if I wasn’t put to the test…against myself. In this journey, I’ve learned some flaws that I have as well as some strengths. I’m learning that we should progress toward the point of mastering our flaws and being comfortable to showcase our strengths confidently.  Back to the quote, don’t pray and expect to get a quick and easy answer but be ready and willing enough to go through the trials and tribulations to get to where you need to be. Familiarity and growth don’t live in the same house. If you want to grow, you can’t be afraid of leaving the familiar. I use to wonder, how would I know if God is going to answer such a prayer and I realize that he is. I see my growth through the things I say, do and believe. Pray with an understanding and the eagerness to learn. Yes it may feel uncomfortable, but the most beautiful things come out of a struggle. 

Yellow Tape

No more yellow tape

No more red/white/blue lights patrolling the area

Love shouldnt be put behind bars and thrown away the key

because, when I think of love…

I think of loving without restriction

loving without caution

and loving with out fear

Love shouldnt have boundaries, its a free for all

Im done with trying to hold back my love

Time after time, ive gave my heart away

with the yellow tape surrounding it.

Im ready to cut the tape,

give somebody a piece of it with no limitations

Taking off my shades and looking love right in the eyes

while my heart speaks “I am not afraid of you, giving nor receiving” 

No more yellow tape surrounding me mentally

Ive spent years of being cautious and look where that has got me

Life is about LIVING, and living doesnt  not me scared or always worrying

it means to be free.

Ive loved and Ive lost, but I will continue to love until

someone has gained my love.

Push

Sometimes we tend to kick ourselves while were already down. Stop it. It’s during our weakest moments where we need to push ourselves the hardest. Their is a big difference between kicking ourselves and pushing ourselves. The world already does enough kicking us while were down, it makes no sense for us to be doing to the same. Word of the day: PUSH.

I wore you like a bruise...

I wore you like a bruise,

everytime I looked at you,

that pain became familiar.

Just by one touch, I could 

feel the depth of our history.

I wore you like a bruise,

even if I dont see you, I feel you.

That bruise below my knee where

I was begging for you to stay,

to that deeply penetrated bruise over my heart

that just wont go away.

I wore you like a bruise,

trying to hide that part of me,

not realizing that the pain was superficial, it was only temporary.

You’re like the bruise Im no longer afraid to show,

because that pain only leads to recovery and growth.

I wore you like a bruise,

and you wore me like the freshly chewed gum on the bottom of your shoe.

With every step you make, you know that im there,

though in my mind, that piece of gum only represents 

old paths and insecurities that I no loner walk or see.

I wore you like a bruise….

HAPPINESS IS TO ME...

H. Heavenly spiritual

A. Awakening of my soul in my physical

P. Pain worn as a crown, mastered to the Tee,

P. Perception of Life’s imbalances for they really mean

I. Inner joy at each breath of fresh air

N. Natural mix of personalities, redefining our own realities.

E. Earth’s tranquility that lies in the back of my mind.

S. Strength of the overcoming of my seasons evolving in its own time

S. Something that I am, and that I contribute too, something that never leaves even when being ripped bare.

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